Caroline Kalai, Psy.D.

I have been through a lot. Life and my inner drive to heal has shown me how to reach other people deeply. As a result, I have found how to properly utilize my formal education with my empathetic heart and investigative mind. For me, this is not a job, but my life purpose. I love what I do because I genuinely find meaning and authentic connection with my patients. I always work from my heart, using my acquired knowledge and communication skills to support my passion. That is why my approach to psychotherapy is integrative. There is no one way to treat all. And it is also why I have become adept at various empirically-supported and evidenced-based treatment interventions. That's just a fancy way of saying I can use methods that are objectively measurable (i.e., diagnostic and symptomatic scales to measure progress), and subjectively measurable (i.e., observable changes in emotional awareness and well-being). These interventions include cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) which encompasses Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) for OCD and Anxiety Disorders, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) to secure people in their unique values and flow through life with mindfulness skills, as well as Prolonged Exposure (PE) for PTSD. In addition, I enjoy existential and depth psychology to work through underlying causes of distress in order to help people find deeper meaning in their lives. The latter tends to be the final stage of therapy, regardless.

As an example of this approach, I may use CBT initially to work on identifying one's distorted beliefs about themselves or others, and to foster rational thinking skills, relieve short-term emotional distress, develop realistic solutions to problems, or acceptance of unchangeable circumstances. As I often tell my patients, however, the work does not stop at restructuring negative assumptions and maladaptive behaviors--all of which are controlled by the mind. It often requires a deep dive into the "self" and one's emotional development in early childhood to examine why we often lose ourselves and develop mental illnesses as survival strategies. At the core, we often find attachment traumas, difficulty confronting our "shadow," and abandoning our true nature. Most of the time, we discover that our core fears just manifest in superficial conditions (i.e., diagnostic illnesses) to protect an inner child who is still hurting. Therefore, it is my mission to help others notice and nurture the part of themselves they've ignored for too long. And the best part of engaging in therapy this way is that it bring us both meaning to our lives--patients discover and learn how to love their true selves while I model freedom in being my true self.

As such, I find that my practice particularly benefits individuals seeking answers and redirection, not just symptom relief. Often, that means uncovering and overcoming early trauma that resurfaces during life transitions. For this reason, I have found that my work attracts many adolescents transitioning into individualized adults, professionals in their 20s and 30s seeking more satisfaction in their personal lives, and middle-aged adults who fear that lost opportunities will permanently contaminate their futures. Furthermore, I have developed parenting skills that has earned me respect from parents who need guidance on how to deeply connect to their children so that their children can grow up to be emotionally secure adults with a confident sense of who they are as unique individuals.

In addition to individual therapy, my research and training in Integrative Behavioral Couple Therapy (IBCT) has supported my work with pre-martial couples to help them effectively navigate the issues existing in dating and relationships in the modern day. I have contributed to the literature in IBCT as well as Cognitive Therapy for Couples and Families during my graduate training. I love helping couples, families, and parents connect or reconnect with healthier emotional boundaries and supportive skills. Ultimately, the healthiest relationships come down to honesty, authenticity, and mutual vulnerability en route to acceptance and deeper love for one another.

Overall, I would describe myself as authentic, real, practical, straightforward, honest, and genuinely compassionate. And I am committed to maximizing these qualities to benefit my patients for as long as I can.

I look forward to meeting you. And mostly, I look forwarding to helping you live your best, most authentic life.